Rita & Lolita

Rita&Lolita7Lolita: Wow, it’s hard to believe that spring starts in March—but I am looking forward to some mild weather. I’d like to forget the February 10-foot snow drifts that were outside my door. Rita: What Lolita is trying to say is, “Welcome to the March online-only issue of the Noise.” We do this every March—so don’t think that we’ve given up on print issues. In fact it’s the print issues that make our websites so popular. The Noise in print is a constant reminder of where to go on the web to look for information on music in New England. Lolita: In this issue we feature singer/songwriter TIM GEARAN. You also get stories on KATHY SANDS-BOEHMER (me&thee), and THE BLACK CHEERS.  And besides the regular cast of columns, check out the new look of the Noise store!
Rita: Since this is an online-only issue it’s only natural that we focus on the amazing World Wide Web and our favorite parts of it. Lolita: Now, I’d appreciate it if our male readers stopped asking me about an adult site that they think I’m on. It’s not me. That woman who looks like me and calls herself Lolita is an impostor! Can’t you see she’s wearing a wig?! Rita: Calm down, Lolita, adjust your wig, and get to the Question of the Month. Lolita: Is it crooked? I asked my buddies to tell me about their favorite site or blog, but not that one! Here’s what they would admit to me… JOHN EYE (John Eye/ One of Us/ Necessary Blackout Studios/ Beach Haus Studios): My favorite blog is RumorControl.us. *** JOHNNY DEL (Gyro Lula): A favorite site of mine is called Shorpy Historical Photo Archive. I’ve had an interest in vintage photography forever and this is the place for it! Most photos are from the Library of Congress with others from members. The types or categories are endless—from Americana, Civil War, aviation, railroads (my favorites), sports, and cities. Kodachromes from the ’20s and ’30s from their vintagraph vault. Just a whole lot of great stuff! You can join and submit your own pics and blog, or just browse through all that is Shorpy! *** NATE MORRISON (The Drum Shop North Shore): My favorite site/blog is TheAcademyMaine.com. It’s a Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu school up in Maine. I trained there for years and it was life-changing! Great exercise with a practical application. Learn to defend yourself and you’ll be more confident and get in great shape! *** MACH BELL (Bag O’ Nails): The site I always go to most is http://www.bostongroupienews.com/ That is the Boston Groupie News page operated by Miss Lyn and Blowfish Lovell.  I get most of my news and cultural info from them. *** CHANDLER TRAVIS (the Catbirds): It’s not the one I visit most, but it’s a real doozy: a German website that features a variety of stories about wrapping Roy Orbison in clingfilm: http://michaelkelly.artofeurope.com/karl.htm; includes a Christmas-themed chapter I’ve read aloud at many Cavalcades. *** MARK KAYE (HearNowLive.com):  My favorite website is billboard.com.  I go there to remind me how decrepit the music industry has become.  Each day they post news about artists that have no relevancy to today’s generation of music lovers.  They have become like the record labels that were forced to close due to lagging record sales.  In 2012 old-catalog LPs outsold new-catalog LPs for the first time in the history of record sales, yet Billboard.com continues to support musicians who come and go like the wind. *** KAREN DeBIASSE (Girl on Top):  www.infowars.com is the site I use for my homepage for alternative news. Been listening to Infowars for almost fifteen years now. *** CARL BIANCUCCI (Arrogant Casserole): www.awfulplasticsurgery.com  Bad boob jobs (Tara Reid, Kate Beckinsale), collagen fish lips (Courtney Love, Meg Ryan), skin-tight faces (Wayne Newton, Carrot Top) and more. Fascinating AND frightening. *** RICK BERLIN (with the Nickel & Dime Band): Favorite site: Rachel Maddow. This woman is a professor of the difficult, clarifies the minefield of political discourse, challenges the status quo and is a 21st century muckraker. She’s factual, funny, and is my guide-of-the-day on all the issues that matter, including the ones I know next to nothing about. *** KIER BYRNES (Three Day Threshold):  Facebook is my primary go-to source when I need to promote my music. We just recently got asked to join a bill opening for national acts the Avett Brothers and Old Crow Medicine Show, and without our Three Day Threshold Facebook page, that wouldn’t have happened. Though Facebook is always changing, it still helps when people click “like” on your band page. *** GREG REINAUER (Melodeego): My favorite blog to visit is WeArePowershift.org because I can get the latest on scoop on the climate justice revolution! *** PETER MOORE (Count Zero): I want to work for badlipreading.com, almost always makes me laugh. *** JERRY VELONA (Joint Venture Band): I became familiar with StumbleUpon.com quite by accident. (No, I’m not going to say I “stumbled upon” it but that would be true). Since then I’ve been a fan to the point where rehab may be required. Remember Internet Cafés where we’d go to “surf the net” and pay by the hour?  What I love is SU rekindles that spirit of wonder and adventure that was associated with the Web until we all got jaded by its ubiquity.  You’ll find some great sites you probably never would have discovered. Just be sure to set a timer before logging on! *** BILL BRACKEN (Defdealer/ Age Against the Machine): My favorite website is no surprise to anyone who knows me. The Van Halen News Desk www.vhnd.com. I have been following the site for about 10 years. It’s everything past and present about VH. I would check it while eating lunch at my desk. I was blown away one day when I logged on and saw my own face staring back at me. They had posted an article about a song I wrote and recorded with Gary Cherone on vocals. It’s still there filed under Anklelock—”Comin’ to Get Ya.” Gary sings his ass off on this track! *** JON MACEY (Fox Pass/ Hummingbird Syndicate): I was thinking of starting my own blog about a guy who reads magazines while listening to Duke Ellington and Lefty Frizzell. *** GARY SHANE LAVENSON (Gary Shane & the Detour): My favorite site or blog would be Rita and Lolita’s column and reviews (Lolita: you just earned a hig, Gary!), but funniest blog was by JC Lockwood when he wrote about the time Dave Marcus was hauled off to jail while complaining about the volume of the Detour at his own house party in Amesbury. *** HENRY SANTORO (RadioBDC): I try my hardest to board the Rudeness Train on Facebook at least once a day. You never know what you’ll find and it’s always amusing in a rude, crude, and dirty kind of way. It’s the perfect break from all the hard news sites I visit for my job. *** CHUCK U. ROSINA (WMBR/WMFO): I can’t say I have one favorite site above all others.  There are ones that I visit regularly, including Democracynow.org, and fsrn.org (Free Speech Radio News).  Both these sites produce daily news broadcasts on issues of social justice and world affairs.  (the former is broadcast on WZBC, the latter on WMBR).  I’m also fascinated by what one can find on YouTube.  Not only just videos—there is a ton of free music on it.  As a DJ on two of our college based community radio stations, I’ve gotten requests from listeners that I could not find in the station’s library (or my iPod), but was able to find it on YouTube.  21st Century technology—gotta love at least some of it. *** FRANCIS DIMENNO (Wrong Hero/ the Noise). Hard to pick just one, but I would have to go with dangerousminds.net. There are always interesting articles there, by Richard Metzger and other writers, which explore the more obscure outer reaches of pop culture. Rita: I thought we were the obscure outer reaches of pop culture. It’s amazing that the Noise is in our 32nd year of publishing and we are still firmly part of the underground scene. Lolita: But we are holding our heads higher now.

Rita: While Lolita continues to adjust her wig, I’ll give you bits of news I picked up lately through my telepathic sense. After only three gigs Boston’s EL SEVEN decided not to join the ranks of Los Angles’ L7 and Detroit’s L-Seven and changed their name to GYRO LULA and immediately got signed to Dove Records. *** KEN STRINGFELLOW (Posies/Big Star) sings on CORIN ASHLEY‘s new album New Lion Traces. *** PATSY BUGDEN (Corolla DeVille/ Some Girls) has taken over the bass position in THE BRIGANDS, who are releasing Night Patrol. *** Animated artist ROB ZAMMARCHI (x-Skin/ Sweetie) is releasing a series of animated cartoons on YouTube called Groom Lake TV and features ED “MOOSE” SAVAGE (…& His Litany of Complaints/ Moose & the Mudbugs/ Siamese Triplets) doing voiceovers. *** Lolita: The following is a subliminal information plant, or more commonly known as product placement. Rita, what are you watching on TV lately? Rita: I just love The Americans on the FX channel, Wednesday nights at 10 pm. It’s about a pair of undercover Soviet spies living among Americans during the Cold War. I’m in love with the lead actors—MATTHEW RHYS and KERI RUSSELL! *** THEA HOPKINS won second place in the Jan/Feb 2013  American Songwriter Magazine lyric contest for her song “Mississippi River, Mississippi Town.” *** BRIAN MAES (RTZ/ Ernie & the Automatics/ Peter Wolf) and GEORGE SIMPSON (Billy Shake) are working on a rock opera called The Devil And Billy Shake. *** ROGER MILLER (Mission of Burma/ Alloy Orchestra) wrote a review of the book Discord, the Story of Noise that was published in the Wall Street Journal. *** THALIA ZEDEK (Come) is playing every Monday in March at T.T. the Bear’s. Each week she’ll be performing one of her solo albums in full. ***  Punk band DAN WEB & THE SPIDERS are touring Europe in March. *** In February, Woody & Abby’s Right Turn Radio moved to WRKO AM 680 (Sundays at 7 pm), offering a new home for the latest in addiction, recovery, and mental health. Lolita: One day at a time—or one issue at a time—the way the Noise is done.

Rita: While Lolita revisits the Big Book, I will attempt to find out what is unique about some artist’s body or mind. Kristin, you’re up first. Spill the beans…  KRISTEN MILLER (Kristen Miller): I have an extra vertebra in my spine. *** PETER GOUTZOS (Gyro Lula): My hands—because I can hold you with them. I can use them to write, play my drums, and to give my favorite thing ever—the peace sign. And when nobody is looking I can pick my nose with them. *** ANDY MILK (The Vital Might): I have a patch of hair on my stomach, slightly to the left of, and above, my belly button, about two inches by one inch, that’s been nicknamed the “Mason-Dixon line” and “Patchy.” *** RAY MASON (Ray Mason Band / Lonesome Brothers): I’ll be turning 63 this year but still have the mind of a 58-year old! *** MIKE LANGLIE (Twink, the Toy Piano Band!): Just like any other Man from Atlantis, my webbed toes give me superior swimming abilities. The downside is I can’t wear sandals. *** CARLENE BAROUS (Eric Barao Band/ Carlene Barous Band/ Din): I think I have a unique profile. Not that I would wish it upon anyone. It’s lacking indentation, grooves, definition, and seems to be the polar opposite of the coveted angular field. It’s like a webbed profile, from forehead to décolletage. But I like it (finally). *** DJ MÄTTHEW GRIFFIN (the Noise): I have an eidetic memory. Someday, I am going to publish my little black book. *** KEN FIELD (Revolutionary Snake Ensemble/ Agachiko/ Birdsongs of the Mesozoic):  I have a “9” imprinted on the back of my right hand, from attending a Calexico/Yo La Tengo concert in St. Louis a few nights ago.  Also, somewhat decreased high-frequency hearing.  And it might be a “6”—not sure. Rita: Ken, you’re looking at your hand the wrong way. It’s not a number. It’s an ancient symbol of an eye peering from your hand chakra, probably telling you to look both ways before you listen to music that is too loud.

Lolita: While Rita regurgitates her last lesson on Mayan history, I’ll work up my own fur ball and get everyone talking about their most recent pet present. Mark, tell us about the formal attire you acquired for your favorite furniture destroyer.  MARK LIND (Ducky Boys): I got my cat, Toonces, a bow tie for his Christmas outfit. He’s a tuxedo cat to begin with, so it complemented his duds pretty well. I live in a basement apartment and his bed is in the window at ground level, so all the neighborhood kids stop and talk to him through the window. Next Christmas I plan to set up a Nativity scene with the cat’s bed being in the place of Baby Jesus. I’m already going to hell, so I may as well have a laugh on the way.  *** DAVID ROBINSON (The Cars): I bought a cage for my pet rabbit Smudgie. *** TAI HEATLEY (Cult 45): I recently bought my one-year-old pet bearded dragon, Paarthurnax, a bag of crickets. When I first got Parther I didn’t think I had it in me to feed her another living creature, but after the first cricket feeding I felt like Tina Turner because Parther’s tank became Thunderdome! Two crickets enter, one dragon feeds. *** MIKE BARRY (Mickey B): peanut butter with Ex Lax for the squirrels.  *** VALERIE KAHN-DORATO (Time Tunnel): I got my dog Zuzu a doghouse. It’s a lovely four-bedroom Tudor in Nahant with breathtaking views of the ocean from nearly every room! I get to visit now and then, but I’m not allowed on the couch! *** ERIK LINDGREN (Birdsongs of the Mesozoic): I bring my Irish setter Molly inside the Pet Food Shoppe and let her sniff everything. We usually come out with a big bag of biscuits, which pleases her to no end.*** KATHY SANDS-BOEHMER (me&thee): Well, it’s like this… there was a clearance sale at Petco and I just had to buy my dog, Sniff, a dinosaur costume.  He’s embarrassed.  Maybe I am too. *** BILL GALATIS (School of Rock Boston/ WCG): I have a white Persian named Gus Gus Chiggins. He looks like Burl Ives with hypertrichosis.  He’s quite picky with what amuses him and has a thing for falling asleep on small stacks of papers.  For his birthday on February 2, I got him a squeaking mouse that hangs by string on the side of an open door.  When he plays with it enough, he moves the door, which I’ve set some papers balancing on the top.  They fall on the ground, he gathers them particularly, and voilà… he passes out. *** LINDA VIENS (Funky White Honkies): We always get Christmas presents for our animals: our parakeets, Skye & Green Bean received new cuttle bones and swings and our two cats, Shariff and Shiloh, received little catnip mice and tiny rolling balls with bells inside.  *** CHRIS BRAT (The Acro-brats/ The Black Cheers/ Rough Splits): A vodka soda for Bubba the dumb dog.  Didn’t buy it FOR him but he drank the whole thing when i wasn’t looking and then squirted hot, wet diarrhea all over the motel room floor during the night. *** DAVE TREE (Tree/ DrugWar/ SuperPower): I bought my dog Luch (a white Siberian Husky with blues eyes) a can of tuna for Christmas. She likes tuna.  *** SLIMEDOG (thrashnbang.com): The latest present I bought for Harry the cat was a gun. Like most right-thinking Americans I think we have too little guns—not too much—besides the fact that we have 50 percent more guns per capita than any other country. Why should he have to hunt his prey when he can gun them down? And if any dog gives him hassle, no bushy tail—he’ll blow him away! I do, though, have to be more aware of when his dinnertime approaches. Lolita: Are you sure it’s safe to arm your cat? SLIMEDOG: If all animals were armed there would be no more animal cruelty!

Lolita: Look at that—not only do you learn about the people who make music in New England, you get tips on how to end animal cruelty! Rita: And dear reader, how much did you pay for this information? We treat you right. So tell your friends about the Noise. We plan to double our readership in 2013—so if each of you finds just one more reader, we’ll be all set. We will pay you back with love and kindness. See you back in print come April Fool’s Day—and that’s no joke.

RIP: JOE COUGHLIN (Associate editor of the Noise): Boston-area impresario and music critic, passed away on Monday, February 26 around 12 noon after a long battle with cancer. Lolita: Joe liked to end his phone conversation with a series of his latest jokes. And they usually made me laugh. Rita: He put more character into his writing than any critic in Boston. We will miss him and his byline. We love you, Joe.

Here are a few links to some of Joe’s writings:




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