By T Max and Joe Coughlin
20 YEARS AGO
Cover: Anastasia Screamed, Slapshot
Bullet LaVolta, Lemonheads, Birdsongs of the Mesozoic, Galaxie 500,
Tribe, Roger Miller, Mr. Butch
Gossip & Stuff: Rita and Lolita start their column with a
complete analysis of the Rumble that includes their predictions. Rita
picks Slapshot, a hard ass hardcore band, to win, and Lolita picks the
Bags. Lolita was right. I guess Lolita had more influence on the judges. Slapshot was the
last band in the prelims. The singer came out and said something like,
“We want to thank the other 24 bands for opening up for us.” *** Hey! Summertime birthdays! Johnny Angel
(Blackjacks) 6/24, Cam Ackland (Prime Movers) 6/28, Evan Shore (Voodoo
Dolls) 7/9, Rick Harte (Ace of Hearts) 7/18, Kenny Chambers (Bullet
LaVolta) 7/21. *** Brett Milano says he wants “Gabba Gabba Hey”
written on his tombstone, and WBCN’s Juanita (lovely-legged cousin
of Rita and Lolita) predicts that she will die in 2014. In 1989 that
probably felt like a long ways away—but that’s five years from now!
*** GG Allin is one of the featured artists in the centerfold of Famous
Tattooed Men & Women. Dick Tate (the Slaves) is in there, too.
*** In 1989 the Rumble paid $350 for a preliminary set. With 10% inflation
per year, that would make comparable pay in 2004 a whopping $1452.
15 YEARS AGO
Dirt Merchants (Rumble winner)
Doc Hopper, Flying Nuns, Delta Clutch, Fuzzy, the Elevator Drops, Slughog,
the Wrong Hero, Bulkhead, Red Tomato
Gossip & Stuff: The gossip column starts off with a big photo
of me and Izzy posing in the totaled car that landed me in the hospital
with broken ribs and a collapsed lung. *** The late Mikey Dee admits
to hopping the fence at Great Woods to raise his lighter for the Bee
Gees. *** The Wrong Hero gets banned from Club Bohemia
for singing “I Steal Weapons to Commit Further Crimes.” *** Linda
Viens (Crown Electric Company) thinks Neil Diamond is strong and sexy
in a fatherly kind of way. I’m
a believer! *** David Minehan
(the Neighborhoods) sits in for Brad Whitford of Aerosmith during their
Japanese tour. Was
that the same tour that Carly Simon
was a photo-double for Steven Tyler? *** Boston Rock Opera is advertising their
first (and only) original rock opera: Crackpot Notion by Tim
Robert. *** The Borg changes their name to Daddy Master & Micro
Chip when the Star Trek
corporation sends them a cease and desist order. You
failed to mention that the order was for you to stop playing, period.
Just kidding. *** And last but not least: New Kids on the
Block break up. Unfortunately,
that didn’t last.
10 YEARS AGO
Cover: The Sheila Divine (Rumble winner)
Bands: Crackpipe Wisconsin, Joe Rockhead, Bleu, the In Out, Psychotic
Larry, Lightning Bolt, Reflecting Skin, Ross Phasor, Honeyglazed, 27,
far as I know, the only band to write a song about Crispin Glover’s
infamous appearance on Letterman (when Crispy damn near took Dave’s
head off). When I saw ’em, they even threw
in the bad karate moves.
Gossip & Stuff: Tao Jones sends a disturbing nasty letter
whining about a bad review of his bands DIY CD, with the stance that
because it was DIY it deserves a good review. The band was Yanni DiFranco.
*** Another good letter comes from Bug Syphlloid about censorship, prompted
when a Noise advertiser pulled their ad because of nudity in the Syphlloids’
ad. *** And still in the letters column, Joe Coughlin tears a new butthole
in another band that was dissatisfied with their CD review.
*** When Lolita says her date was horrific, it means it was horrible.
If she says it was terrific it means it was terrible. And if it sucked, well…you
get the idea.
*** This is the first year the Rumble adds a wild card band to the finals.
Half Cocked is that wild card and they come in second place. Wild carders have taken
the top prize twice in recent years, first the Campaign For Real-Time,
and now the Luxury.
*** The True or False column is all about specific instruments that
are played. It reminded me that in Jack Drag they used matching Hagstrom
basses (one red, one blue). If
they’re different colors, they’re not matching. Think I should bring back the True or False? Sure, but change it to
Blue or False. *** In Scene
Hell, Francis DiMenno quotes Richard Smoley who predicts that young
people will stop listening to rock ’n’ roll by 2005. Tell that to
the kids who are fans of American Idol. Does American Idol count
as rock ’n’ roll? It
doesn’t even count as entertainment.
Oh, come on—new generations always take a different look at entertainment,
not always to the liking of the previous ruling genres. But there many
of the older generation that won't agree with you Joe. How ’bout Rod
Stewart, Brian May (Queen), Cindy Lauper, Kiss, and even one-time Bostonian
Jules Shear who all played a role in American Idol’s final
show this year.
5 YEARS AGO
Jake Brennan & the Confidence Men, American Pulverizer, the Cringe
Kenne Highland, Read Yellow, Seekonk, the In Out, John Felice &
the Lowdowns, the Gobshites, Lars Vegas, Classic Ruins, Doom Buggies,
Ad Frank & the Fast Easy Women, the Dresden Dolls, the Information,
Scamper, the Marvels, the Charms, the Brett Rosenberg Problem
Gossip & Stuff: We find out what rockers like about Boston—fried
clams, the Red Sox, Billy Ruane, its walk-ability, and the snotty fucking
holier-than-thou cold-hearted intellectual attitude. *** Chandler Travis
changes his name to Habooga Kapalopackey. He’s
also released music under the name Lippy Blappinklappy, including the
wonderfully stupid “Bongo’s Summer Cottage.” Look for it on YouTube. ***
Roger (Runner & the Thermodynamics) tore some ligaments and tendons
in his head when he totaled a car in front of him that stopped short.
*** Our copy editor, Meghan McFarland, writes a scathing letter to our
own writer, Sleazegrinder, with ill will wishes for his upcoming book
that is filled with words like “haveta.”*** Accomplishments: Robby
Roadsteamer wins a Bass Ale comedy contest; the Dresden Dolls are on
the Lollapalooza tour; Bleu’s song “Trust Me” is featured on an
episode of Joan of Arcadia; Apollo Sunshine appears on Carson Daley;
[munk]’s “Knucklebones” is featured on The Sopranos; Muck
& the Mires win the Little Steven Garage Rock Battle of the Bands;
Cynthia von Buhler is featured on Chronicle; Joseph & Nabil
Sater buy the National Guard Armory.
Supposedly to become an art and performance space, and still sittin’
there. What’s the deal? Joe, Hi-N-Dry is part of the Armory Arts Center
and they’ve started putting shows together—see the live review of
Rick Berlin in the current print issue (#292).