5/10/15/20 July 2009

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By T Max and Joe Coughlin

20 YEARS AGO
Issue #86 – July 1989

Cover: The Bags (Rumble winners)

Bands: Buffalo Tom, Slapshot, Jerry’s Kids, November
Group, Big Barn Burning

Gossip &
Stuff
: Rita and Lolita brag
about the accuracy of their Rumble predictions and decide to go into
the fortune telling business. Lolita designs a sign that reads “Lovely
Lolita Flange Sees All, Let Her Be Your Telepathic Servant.”
So now they could add
ESP to their OCD, ADD, and PMS. Not to mention STD’s (they shoulda
laid off the LSD and PCP), but they went to CVS in their BMW, and everything
was AOK (until they got a DUI).
When Rita asks why her name is not on the sign,
Lolita tells her that it’s not necessary since she will be “in”
the sign— it’s a sandwich-board style sign
.
I fondly remember having a sandwich with those two dames. I was the
meat.
I remember Lolita telling
me how quick the mayo was applied to that sandwich. *** On the Town
starts up on WMFO with DJ Mikey Dee. *** The Bags release a side project
LP as Swamp Oaf. *** Eric Van thinks the Rumble would have been better
if Big Barn Burning and the Well Babys had ended up in the finals. ***
Leo birthdays! Juliana Hatfield 7/27, Cam Ackland (Voodoo Dolls) 7/28,
Lee Harrington (the Neighborhoods) 8/4, Kristen Hersh (Throwing Muses)
8/8, Frank Rowe (Classic Ruins) 8/10, Nancy Neon (the Noise)
8/17, Kris Fell (Phoenix) 8/18. Thermos X. Pimpington (Voodoo
Screw Machine) 8/8, and Dave Pino (Waltham) 8/8. *** The Channel sells
a summertime pass for $30, good for every show during the summer.
The
club makes extra money that the bands never see.
And
it sure as hell didn’t go towards air conditioning or cleaning the
vomit outta the carpets, either. I think it went to the bouncers’
steroid fund.

15 YEARS AGO
Issue #141 –  July/Aug
1994

Cover: 6L6

Bands: The Gravel Pit, Charlie Chesterman, Letters
to Cleo, Scarce, Fuzzy, Gigolo Aunts, Naked Lunch Box, Mick Mondo, the
Barnies, Miles Dethmuffen, Señor Happy, Irresponsibles, the Borg

Gossip &
Stuff
: Joe, can you name all
five members of Devo?
I
got four of the five from their main lineup (1975-1985). But I can still
whip it good!
Well, Mikey Dee could, and by doing so he won
tickets to see Carly Simon.
That’s
a pretty strange association right there.
Did I ever tell you that I backed her up on
“Things We Said Today” at her brother Peter’s wedding?
That’s even stranger! *** The only thing that Jeff Conolly (Lyres)
ever won was a toy in a Happy Meal.
Don’t
tell him they come with the meal (it’s not winning), or he’ll REALLY
be unhappy.
*** Polka papa Al Janik
names his band Rattle Heatre after a ripped ticket from the Brattle
Theatre. *** David Minehan launches his new band—Star Darts. *** Nat
Freeberg (the Flies) creates the band Upper Crust before it becomes
the name for an upscale pizza restaurant chain.
Why
do people still yell “Freeberg!” at Lynyrd Skynyrd shows? It’s
not like he’s gonna show up or anything.

*** Evan Shore (Mach 5)
eats 27 flavors of ice cream in one sitting. Note: Mach 5 was the
working name for what would become the Nines, and not the Mach Bell
band of some years later.

*** Francis DiMenno won a jar
of M&Ms by guessing how many M&Ms were in it. *** Rita and Lolita
determine that one of the secrets to success is to spend a lot of time
in the bathroom peeing. Not sure if that counts if you have a urinary
tract infection.
Depends
(if ya get my drift). Sorry, I was just being pithy.
*** Twenty-one bands play a benefit for me
after my car is totaled. I broke a couple of ribs and
my lung collapsed. The $8,000 raised saves
the Noise from being totaled. Sadly, my date for the benefit
flatlines during the show while being rushed to Cambridge Hospital.
Luckily she was successfully jump started with the paddles. This isn’t
a joke!
If
they’d used the paddles on the magazine, you coulda put the money
in your pocket, the way the show was plugged. I’m calling the IRS.
Unless you wanna throw me a benefit, of course.

10 YEARS AGO
Issue #193 –  July/Aug
1999

Cover: Tree, the Push Stars, Chandler Travis Philharmonic,
Ms. Pigeon

Bands: Caged Heat, Babaloo, the Pills, Seks Bomba,
the Shods, Cave In, Emily Grogan, Jedediah Parish, Darkbuster, Volcano
Suns, Moving Targets, Buffalo Tom, Helicopter Helicopter, Three Day
Threshold, the Sheila Divine, Señor Happy, Mickey Bliss Organ Combo

Gossip &
Stuff
: In Incoming Mail there’s
a debate over who used the name Master Bates first, Dickens or Daniel
Defoe
. *** The whole world mourns with Boston rockers
when Mark Sandman suddenly dies on stage outside of Rome, Italy on July
3rd. *** Boston Rock Opera covers “Happiness Stan” by the Small
Faces as part of Art Beat in Davis Square. I played a wizard, and soon
after, I start really believing that I’m a wizard. Blame it on the
Prednisone I was taking for poison ivy. *** Sandy Monticello (Heidi)
writes in praising Joe Coughlin’s much-needed blast of honesty and
humor in the Noise.
Sandy
has since added Neades to her last name, having married Ray of Beefy/DC.
They loaded up the truck and moved to L.A., but are still looking for
some Texas Tea.
*** Joe Coughlin uses the band name “the
Replacements” 68 times in a review of the Modifiers
. The word-count limit
forced me to be conservative.
*** Shred starts booking the blacklit, pool-tabled
Skybar. *** The Gravel Pit and the Figgs unite to form the Gentlemen.
*** Godsmack’s debut album goes platinum. *** Lolita wants to ask,
“How do you embarrass an archeologist?”
(I’m
not diggin’ that one)
but the Question of the Month is what’s your
favorite summer song? Some Answers: “Sunny Afternoon” (the Kinks),
“Got to Get You Into My Life” (the Beatles), “Hot Fun in the Summer
Time” (Sly & the Family Stone), “All Going Out Together” (Big
Dipper), “Summertime” (Billy Stewart), and “Summer in the City”
(the Lovin’ Spoonful).
What?
No Mungo Jerry?!?

5 YEARS AGO
Issue #243 – July/Aug
2004

Cover: Paranoid Social Club, Lovewhip, Labb, Nick
Z, the Pills (tour diary)

Bands: Mission of Burma, Tiger Saw, the Blackjacks,
Lady of Spain, the Good North, the Bags, Harris, Aloud, Din, Bamboo
Steamers, Kahoots, Helms, the Dents, the Silver Lining, Kenne Highland
& His Vatican Sex Kittens, Eric Martin & the Illyrians, Molly
Coddle, Twink, Awakening Stick, Midnight Creeps

Gossip & Stuff: Wow, there’s a dynamic Liz Linder live
shot of the Pills with Dave Thompson four feet in the air. *** Noise
Board softball is alive and well with a photo of bare-chested Joe Kowalski
(Onlyone) smacking a rocket to right field. There’s also a photo of
Jeff Oliphant (Big Dipper) at bat from 1987.
I
showed up for one of those post-game “swinger’s parties.” Talk
about false advertising
! *** Shred starts booking O’Brien’s; Brett
Milano stops booking Johnny D’s; Joe Feloni begins booking the Skybar;
and Steve Sell ends his tenure of booking the Middle East. *** Sandy
“Sandybomb” Monticello joins Sugarbomb,
later
changed to Sugabomb to avoid a potential lawsuit by an existing Sugarbomb
(and maybe to emphasize the Boston accent?).

*** Joan Wasser (Dambuilders)
starts Joan As Police Woman. *** Bill Brackin (Boston Rock Opera) joins
Wack Ass Egyptians. *** Malachite plays a reunion. *** Oedipus retires
from WBCN after 29 years of loyalty. He holds onto overseeing 16 stations
(owned by Infinity Broadcasting) for Alternative Programming. *** Three
Day Threshold wins Best Local Roots act two years straight in the
Phoenix
poll. *** Ken Cmar (Wonderdrug Records) reports that he once had a dream
where he had not forsaken his early career path as a pro bowler after
discovering the joys of sex, drugs, and rock ’n’ roll in his teenage
years. In the dream he dominated the Wild Turkey Eastern Regionals and
was sponsored by Miller beer and Odor Eaters.
What
is it with bowling and alcohol, anyway
? *** Jon Bernhardt celebrates 20 years of hosting
Breakfast of Champions
on WMBR. That means in 2009 he’s been hosting
the show for 25 years!
And
no truth to the rumor that Wild Turkey and Miller beer are Jon’s own
breakfast of champions.

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