5/10/15/20 March 2009

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BY T MAX and THE
WRONG HERO

20 YEARS AGO
Issue #82     March 1989

Cover: Think Tree, Xanna Don't, Vasco Da Gama
Bands: Anastasia Screamed, Classic Ruins, Busted Statues, Raging
Lemmings, Blood Oranges, Dogzilla,
Gossip & Stuff: Fans of Count Zero can see Will Ragano with
a full head of hair in Think Tree. *** Rita claims Lolita talks about
the warmer weather coming because she can't wait to start screwing outside
again.
Hooray,
Hooray, it's the first of May. Outdoor screwing begins today.
*** Here are a couple of Boston star birthdays—Rick
Ocasek (The Cars) 3/23 and Steven Tyler (Aerosmith) 3/26. And I happen
to know that Sarah RabDAU's birthday is 3/6—she's a new star. ***
A new local show on WMBR is announced—Pipeline. *** Bunratty's buys
a new sound system and sells their old one to Green Street Station.
Classic. From the
ridiculous to the sublime….

***
Sax player Ken Field joins Birdsongs of the Mesozoic. *** Christmas
is edited out of The Morton Downey Show when Michael Cudahy breaks
the jaw of Ace Frehley (Kiss) for being a bigot and racist. *** David
Greene (now producer of NPR's Car Talk) comes back from England with
chicken pox. *** AJ Wachtel (Waddy's brother? No, they're not related)
talks about being toasted on Moroccan hash in Casablanca, riding on
a camel led by two bare breasted women.
Not
exactly a change from his usual habits….

15 YEARS AGO
Issue #137     March 1994

Cover: Bulkhead
Bands: Peter Wolf, Mistle Thrush, Dirt Merchants, Twig, Miles
Dethmuffen, Alloy Orchestra, Swirlies, Butterscott, Papas Fritas, BB
Gallini, Sumac, BJ Snowden, the Allstonians, Big Catholic Guilt, 6L6,
Tulips
Gossip & Stuff: Kenne Highland passes out while performing
on stage at Club Bohemia.
He
tends to black out whenever the blood rushes to his kielbasa…
*** All Mod Cons (Boston's Jam Tribute
Band) heads out on their fifth European tour. *** WBCN celebrates its
26th anniversary with Peter Wolf hosting their annual Rockin' Radio
House Party. *** Some new bands get together. Chris Cugini (x-Anastasia
Screamed) forms Delta Clutch….
and
gives lots of free advertising to the real Delta Clutch at 330 Smith Street
in Providence.
Trojan Ponies
start galloping; Butterscott is lead by Jonathan Scott with Mikey Dee
on drums—and sometimes Brett Milano sits in on drums. *** Boston Rock
Opera presents Jesus Christ Superstar with Gary Cherone and Doug
Thoms vocally wailing on each other. *** David Charles (Sidewalk Gallery)
and Lisa Traxler (KISS 108) marry and honeymoon in Quebec. *** Morgan
Huke starts a new show on WMFO called Excursions. *** Skeggie (Tackle
Box) becomes a dad and little Lucas gets his photo in the Noise.
Shades of Who Shot Hollywood. *** Pete Cassani is looking for a drummer—as
common a statement as Marc Schleicher forms a new band, or Lilli Dennison
makes new venue a success!
Or
“T Max hates war because he was drafted right after Pearl Harbor.”

10 YEARS AGO
Issue #189    March 1999

Cover: The Peasants, Boy Wonder
Bands: The Red Telephone, Tree, Little A, Johnny Black Trio,
Gang Green, the Curtain Society, the Roys, Four Piece Suit, the Proletariat,
Weeping In Fits And Starts, Asciento, Godboy, Meaghan McLaughlin, Gravel
Pit, Betwixt, Neptune, the Figgs, Medea Connection, Chris Mascara, the
Electric Logs, Keith Bowniece
Gossip & Stuff: I prepare all my dirty clothes for the laundromat
but somehow manage to put the bag of laundry out as garbage. Lots of
cool T-shirts end up in the dump that day.
And
lots of schizophrenic homeless men find themselves unknowingly promoting
local bands
.
*** Steev Riccardo
gives up booking the Linwood and Phil Hopkins takes over. *** Peter
DuCharme gets swamped with work when his soundtrack of a very popular
Volkswagen TV commercial hits the air. It's the one with the windshield
wipers keeping time. *** Rita and Lolita create the Touting Tapeworm
Award for the best answer to the Question of the Month that turns into
a self-promoting proclamation.
Maybe
we should bring back that award
I could use some more trophies
on my mantle
.
*** Peter Moore
(Count Zero) admits that he was six or seven when he started creating
a new language called Queven. *** Crackpipe, Wisconsin (a Boston band)
wins the Conan O'Brien Band Search contest and appears on the show.
*** Musicians Magazine announces its last issue to be published
(April 1999). *** Hey, more new bands! Maria Christopher goes from her
Rumble-winning band, Dirt Merchants, to a new artier band: 27. *** Scrapple
gets going with Tom Scanlon, Dave Geissler, Lisa McColgan, and Chris
Everett. Look for gigantic body parts on stage—namely butts and a
vagina. *** John Dragonetti (Jack Drag) and Peter DuCharme (Master Cylinder)
start the Junior Communist Club
.
And single-handedly declares war on Chechnya.

5 YEARS AGO
Issue #239  March 2004
Cover
: Baby Strange, the Dents, the Collisions
Bands: Count Zero, Antler, Smorgasbord, Stoic, Eric Marcos &
Normal Noises, Verona Downs, Ad Frank, The Blackstone Valley Sinners,
Duke & the Drivers, Sarah RabDAU, Furvis, Catapult, the Franc Graham
Band, Kenne Highland & his Vatican Sex Kittens, American Pulverizer,
Aloud, Reverse, Valhalla Kittens, Wack Ass Egyptians, Lyres, the Real
Kids, the Coffin Lids, the December Sound, the So And So's, Eyes Like
Knives, the Rudds, Scamper, Mappari, Amanda Palmer, the Lot Six, Runner
& the Thermodynamics, Loveless, Heavy Stud, Black Helicopter, Bon
Savants
Gossip & Stuff: Ahh—we have a photo of presidential hopeful
John Kerry's college band from 1961—the Electras. Erik Lindgren broke
the news of this band to the Washington Post.
Though
he sensitively neglected to mention his own award-winning band, the
Space Negroes.
*** We've got
a great incoming letter from Jeff Monoman Conolly's ex-girlfriend who
is in a tizzy because Jeff listed a bunch of items in the previous issue
that he claims she stole from him. She attempts to set the record straight
by adding that Jeff was arrested for assaulting her.
What
was there to steal? Mice? Cockroaches? Parrot shit?
***
Another piece of mail compliments the Noise Board and at the same time
complains that Kenny Chambers is being slandered on the board.
Someone named
“Guest” claimed that Kenny swiped his riffs from Thurston Moore.
*** There's a centerfold of Rotund Plant (Ray
Neades) of Lard Zeppelin. In his white muumuu he looks not unlike the
gigantic and constantly growing mound of February snow piled up at the
end of my driveway. *** An ad appears for my other ’zine—Squirrels
Etc. *** Bleu's song “I Won't Move to Hollywood” appears in two
nationally released films, Mean Girls and Win a Date with Tad Hamilton.
Funny that later Bleu moved to L.A. *** Kier Byrnes (Three Day Threshold)
has himself arrested and thrown in jail to raise money for bail that
will actually be donated to the Muscular Dystrophy Association.
That’s one less thing
to worry about—Kier will fit nicely into Jerry Lewis’s worn out
shoes.

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